In February I experienced my first "first" in a really long time. It was a hard, emotional and draining experience. The passing away of a loved one here in Spain.
My boyfriend's grandmother passed away at the age of 87. She was born in Villacañas where she got married, had three children and died. She's only left there a handful of times. She didn't have her first washing machine until she was given one by her son when she was already in her 80s. Even then she would fill it up with a bucket of water, hand wash her clothes in it and then wring her clothes out in the tub. She would help her children harvest grapes and olives until she was in her 80s. Used a wood stove to keep warm. Never went to the doctors until she had multiple-organ failure last year and slipped into a coma. And she's struggled ever since. Struggled with being lonely, with feeling useless and restless.
Her birthday was in January and we had got the whole family together to celebrate. She spent the day with her three children, six grandchildren and one great granddaughter and respective "others."
She was staying with my boyfriend's parents and we had spent the weekend with her. Sunday afternoon we said goodbye before leaving to come back home. We didn't suspect anything. But as we parked our car outside our house a little over an hour later, we received a call. She had started seizing, vomiting for about 15 minutes. And that was it. She died.
Although it shouldn't have been, it was a real shock. We had just spent the weekend with her and in one short hour she was gone.
In Spain, when someone dies, they are immediately taken to the mortuary. They didn't perform an autopsy on her, no need. She was dressed in her wedding dress which was black. She had it fitted years ago and had bought her coffin too in preparation.
Her body was layed out on a table behind a glass for the whole of the night. She was holding a bible and rosary. The family stayed there and received visitors for almost 24 hours. Local women came and chanted and prayed for her soul.
She was then taken to the church for a short service. Afterwards she was placed in a hearse that drove slowly to the cemetary. The men followed on foot and helped lower her in her grave. In Villacañas, people are not buried undergrown. Instead they are placed in cement tombs above ground. She was to be placed in the same tomb as her husband and other relatives and in order to fit that many bodies in there, the bones of the others were placed in burlap sacks and sat on top of her coffin.
You will be missed Melitona.
